Relationship Development

Luis Alamilla

24 March 2011

Corozal junior college

Relationship Development

Coming Together

When it comes to first impressions in getting to know new people, I have difficulty expressing myself. I am a shy person so usually I don’t know what to say cause I do know how the person would react with me. But once I become use to a person I usually become more fluent with expressing myself, but still a little nervous. Once I have broken the ice I become a very likeable person. Then people get to see the type of person I really am.

One day from school I met this girl I really liked. She was a pretty short girl, with black hair and about my age. I would always attract girls by looking at them every minute and having them notice. If she looks back at me the same way, I am able to tell that she is interested. From there I would always have a friend know about this girl and tell him about her. Since I am the shy type I can never start a conversation with the person. So I would always have my friends do the talking for me, from there I would find an opening to do something funny or shameful to get the girls attention. If she starts a conversation with me I can take it from there. This is the initiating part of the relationship for me.

From there me and the girl would continue talking for a while till I run out what to say and run off, or get the feeling that the ice has been broken. From there on every time I would see the girl I would say high in a flirty manner, and try to pick a conversation every chance I get. From there conversations become more fluent and the likeness begins to grow between us. We also begin to share a little more about ourselves and past. This is the experimenting part of a relationship for me.

From this point we decided to start dating and start a relationship with each other. We begin to spend more time together, start sharing more personal things that we wouldn’t usually share with anybody. We begin to get closer with each other in a romantic manner, the physical contact increases in which kissing becomes involved. We would also become more comfortable in lending out our things to each other. At this point she would introduce me to her parents. This is the intensifying part of a relationship development for me.

This point has rarely occurred to me, if I reach this stage, this is where I would introduce the girl to my parents. People would always begin to see us together at school grounds, events and social places. Here we begin to trust each other and the relationship becomes serious between us, where I would consider falling in love with the person. From here the person would practically know everything there is to know about me. Would begin sharing same ideas and likes, in inviting her to come over for family events or watch a movie with me. This is the integrating part and the deepest part of relationship development that I have come crossed.

Luis Alamilla

Coming Apart

When people come apart is usually because when people come on to you at first they share a personality that is wonderful and memorable experience that you fall in love with.

But usually when couples become accustomed to each other their personality begins to change, they either show their true self or begin to take advantage of ones love and trust. This is the main cause where relationships begins to fall, well at least form my point of view.

When me and the girl begin to develop problems in our relationship we begin to loose interest in each other. We begin to have frequent conflicts with each other in public. Whenever we refer to each other we speak as the other partner is not there in the room with us. We then begin to hind some simple things from each other and begin to view every mistake the person does not do right. This is the differentiation part of relationship development to me.

If we believe we can work out things and strive for the better could be possible. But circumscribing stage has never occurred to me. If it does we always end up breaking up in the end.

Well if we continue to go in the same pattern, we are well on the way to breaking up with each other. At this stage we begin to feel less love for each other. We start trying to capture other people’s attention. All feelings toward each other become neutral and just start living like if the person is an extra burden. This is the stagnating part of a relationship development to me.

From here on we begin to have less frequent conversations and if we do we usually start quarrelling. We begin to avoid seeing each other, and we become spiteful and have fewer interactions. We come and go as we please; we no longer have lunch together and begin to change our routine.

When one of us can’t take it living this way we decide to end the relationship. I would usually choose to end the relationship in the easiest and best way a can as possible without trying to hurt the person. Endings are never because once you have become use to a person it is hard to say goodbye. This would be the hardest part of relationship in my perspective which is termination.